A James and Lily Story
by Yami no Tenshi chan
Summary: lily adn James like each other. They just don't know it yet. Luckily for them, Sirius and Remus are going to set James up. And Alice will make Lily make some changes with her own love life. Of course, neither James nor Lily knows anything about it yet


Birthday fic for my friend Alexandra's birthday. It's a light, humerous ficlet that's really quite different from my usual style. I actualyl don't usually read or write Harry Potter fanfiction at all so if I mess up a character or too, don't be too agrivated... --;;

You have no idea how tempted i was to make this SiriusxRemus too but my friend hates slash so... sigh What a waste... I did, though, haev much fun with this fic...

Read and review!

(page break)

A clear autumn friday scattered bright orange and red leaves all around Hogwarts' green lawn. Students of every size and shape walked upon the roads, set aside for such wandering except for three seventh year boys, who were trotting mindlessly on their school's freshly mowed grass.

"GET OFF THE GRASS!" A frustrated professor screamed at them. He had just spent precious hours looking up the charm for mowing lawns in "Lockhart's Gardening Spells" and was outraged at the three youngsters was messing up the precious grass. 'Stupid Minerva,' he thought, 'making me do the stupid chores.'

James Potter, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin jumped at the sound of their charms professor's voice and hurried off the grass.

"I always knew that Flitwick was off his rocket." Sirius muttered, quite bitterly.  
"I mean…just look at his hair."

"You're right." James craned his neck to get a proper look at the poor professor. "He looks like he held his wand backwards on some hex. Poor man."

Remus scoffed. "You two need to stop worrying about your hair and looks so much." He stuck his nose back inside his book, Wizards and Muggles: The Real Story.

Sirius gave his friend a poke on the arm. "Yes, oh course, my dear Remus. We shall give up Quidditch to become a bookworm and talk like this." He said, over articulating all his words.

Remus blushed. "I do not sound like that!" He gave Sirius a small punch and the black-haired boy instantly dropped in mock pain.

"Ow! Remus! Have you been working out? I swear…someday, you'll be a professional Quidditch player!" Sirius laughed at his friend who only gave him a sideways glare. "Besides, without worrying about our hair, how are we going to get girls?" James nodded in agreement.

"Yeah, Remus. Personality and wit are only going to get you so far. As much as girls like that stuff, they don't want to wake up next to a _troll._" James said, reminding himself to fluff up his hair again.

Remus spluttered and coughed. "Wake up? Wake up? Since when?"

"Since…Fifth Year?" Sirius stared at his friend. "Hey…don't say that you've never had a girl before." Remus made no reply. "You haven't? Really?" Sirius laughed.

"Anna and I just…aren't in that stage of our relationship yet." Remus frowned upon Sirius. "I can at least have a meaningful relationship with a girl."

"Touché." Sirius remarked and turned to James. "Speaking of girls, you haven't had one or…a _meaningful relationship_ with one for ages."

"I think it's my hair." James joked. Remus glared at him a bit before speaking.

"It _is_ unlike you to go so long without feeling the urge to show off your masculine-ness to some poor, unsuspecting victims though. What's gotten into you?"

Sirius gave a weird look at Remus at the word "masculine-ness" but agreed nevertheless. "Yeah, James. You know…if you don't find someone quick, people are gonna start thinking that you're…_you know…_" Sirius looked around and whispered. "_Queer._"

James was startled. "Really? But then…I won't be able to get _any_ girls." He was worried.

Sirius clapped his good friend on the back. "Don't worry, James old pal. We'll help you meet the girl of your dreams in just a few weeks." He winked at the other boy. "I've got a _plan._"

"We'll? Just what do you mean by _we_?" Remus jabbed a finger on Sirius' shoulder, making the black haired teenager wince just a bit. "_I_, for one, am not helping James get a girl to snog, and just ignore." Remus said this with dignity.

"Oh yes you will." Sirius said, rather confidently. "Because you won't be able to leave James' love life to just _me_, will you? I mean, if you help out, you'll at least be able to make sure that I don't find someone who's…" Sirius scratched his head, looking for the right word.

"Like you?" James volunteered.

"Exactly!" Sirius grinned at James. "We can't have that now, can we? We need to find someone who James can have a _deep and meaningful relationship_ with, right?"

Remus glared. "You need to stop making fun of me now."

"That means yes." James translated helpfully.

"Good." Sirius clapped his hands together. "It's just a matter of weeks before the perfect girl will be at your side, James." He winked.

"I don't know…" James wasn't sure. "Is this anything like that prank you played on Snape that one time…?"

"Nothing like it, my friend, I promise. And that was Peter's fault anyway." Sirius frowned for a moment before grinning madly, once again. "This is my best plan yet." He gave James what he hoped was a reassuring smile before saluting and starting toward the Gryffindor dorm rooms. "Gotta go get started on that Potions essay!" Sirius waved and ran, jovially, into the distance. James and Remus stared after him.

"What do you suppose he has planned?" James worried. "He smiled kind of weird when he left."

Remus scowled. "I don't know what he has planned but I do know that the Potion's essay was due last week." The boy rolled his eyes before he also started to the dorms. "I suppose I should help him. You coming?"

James shook his head. "I have detention with McGonagall." He said.

Remus frowned disapprovingly and clicked his tongue before sighing in defeat. "Again? You go off to detention then. I'll see you later." He crossed through the lawn, walking toward the castle.

"GET OFF THE GRASS!" A man's voice yelled into the night air.

(page break)

"What about him over here?" Alice pointed to a picture of a random guy in last year's yearbook. "He's cute."

"No." Lily replied to her best friend.

Alice sighed. "You didn't even look at him." She pushed the leather bound book underneath Lily's nose. "Look!"

Lily looked at the picture before saying anything. "No." She said firmly, looking her friend in the eye.

Alice rolled her eyes. "Lily Evans! Honestly, you're in your seventh year and you're _still_ single!" She said, sounding very much like the red-head's mother.

"I just haven't found the right guy yet. Don't push me." Lily wrote something about the cosmos on her piece of parchment and glared at Alice. The two were sprawled out on Lily's bed, Alice trying to convince the bookworm that a single status should not be her fate.

"Come off it, Lily." Alice rolled her eyes and flipped through the year book once again. "Hey…I saw you staring at Amos Diggory yesterday on the Quidditch field." She said, pointing at his picture and winking.

"He threw the quaffle right by my head!" Lily exclaimed, but blushed bright red.

"He's _cute._" Alice smirked a bit.

"He's a player. Never goes out with the same girl twice." Lily frowned.

"Ah, so you've paid attention to all this?" Alice sat up straight, grinning. "Come on, Lily. Fess up."

Lily blushed hotly. "Well, he _is_ kind of cute…" She cleared her throat when she realized what she was saying. "What I mean is that I wouldn't mind going out to dinner with him… But that doesn't mean that--- Alice! Where're you going?"

"_I'm_ going to set you up with him!" Alice announced proudly.

"Alice! No!" Lily grabbed her friend's arm. "NO!"

"Don't worry, Lily. I've got a plan!"

"Oh, no you don't!" Lily made her friend sit back down. "I'm not the kind of girl who will go after someone just because I think that he's cute one day. Tomorrow, I won't even consider him."

"But Lily… He noticed you! That's a good sign!" Alice smiled.

"He threw a ball by my head!" Lily exclaimed.

"He did that to get your attention." Alice rolled her eyes. "And now he does. I mean, think about it, Lily. He has got to be a better Quidditch player than someone who'll just drop the ball on some poor fellow's head, don't you think? He threw the ball at you on purpose!"

Lily paused and looked at Alice. "You think?"

Alice rolled her eyes. "Of _course_!" She grinned at her friend. "just you wait, Lily Evans. In just few weeks, you will be single no more!"

"Oh…I don't know, Alice…"

"What's there to lose?" Alice pointed out. "Come on, I can't do any worse to your love life than what it already is."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily frowned. But Alice did have a point… Sixteen years old, Lily had yet to go on a single date with anyone. "Well, I guess you're _kinda_ right…"

"Of course I am!" Alice exclaimed with confidence. "You just haven't figured out how right I am yet. Leave your love life up to me, Lily Evans, and you won't be sorry." She winked at her friend. "_Trust me_."

Lily sighed. "Oh…_fine._" She said finally. "But no funny business! You can't set me up with just some random idiot. I may be desperate but I _do_ have standards." She instructed.

Alice grinned. "Yes, ma'am." She said.

(page break)

"Put that he's good in bed." Sirius instructed Remus, who was holding a quill over a spare piece of parchment.

"_WHAT?" _Remus' eyeballs practically popped out of their sockets. "No! I am _not_ putting that."

"Why not?" Sirius frowned.

Remus gaped. "Well, number one, that's…weird. Number two, we don't _know_ if he's, um…good in bed." Remus mumbled, blushing. "I am not writing that."

"Well, then, James won't have _anything_ going for him." Sirius frowned. "Lemme see that." He reached for the piece of paper. "See? All we have is 'sense of humor',' good grades', 'Quidditch player', and 'not troll-like.'" Sirius gave the parchment back to Remus.

"Oh, and 'good in bed' is supposed to enhance the list?" He said, sarcastic.

"Who's good in bed?" A familiar voice drifted into the Common Room. James poked a head out from the entrance before sliding out onto two feet. "Anyone I know?" He grinned.

"Oh! Er…" Sirius waved at his friend and walked up to him. "Nothing to worry about. You just go to bed and we'll have most of my plan set up in the morning." He flashed James another reassuring grin.

"Really?" James smiled at his good friend. "Thanks a lot. I mean, I've been thinking… At first, you know, I wasn't really going for this but I was thinking in detention and this is a really nice thing you two are doing for me." He flashed another smile at Sirius and Remus. "I really appreciate it, whatever you two are doing." James gave a high pitched laugh before walking, unbalanced toward the dorms rooms.

Sirius and Remus exchanged glances.

"Uh…James?" Remus called out. "Are you…okay?" He raised an eyebrow when his friend did a heel kick.

"Fine!" James shouted merrily. "Man…that muggle 'bleach' stuff can sure put you in a good mood, huh? McGonagall had me washing the sheets with it and…" James took this chance to erupt into another series of high-pitched laughter. "But whatever… I'm going to bed."

Both Sirius and Remus watched, wide eyed as James shimmied up the hand rail of the stairs. As James neared the top, he waved jovially to both his best friends and disappeared in the boy's dormitories, still grinning like a madman.

"Anyway…" Sirius turned to Remus.

"Sirius! He was high as a balloon!" Remus exclaimed with worry.

The black haired boy only laughed. "You need to work on your analogies, my dear old friend. No balloon can go as high as James is right now."

"We should get help!" Remus started to his feet.

"What's the need? It'll have worn off by morning anyway." Sirius reassured his friend.

"But…" Remus sighed. "I'll let this go…" He said, defeated. He was tired. "But you have to finish that Potions essay while _I'll_ work on this." He waved the piece of paper with James' qualities scribbled across it.

Sirius frowned. "But you won't know what to put!" He protested. "At least say that he's a good kisser."

Remus raised an eyebrow. "Nuh-uh." Sirius made a grab for the parchment and Remus jerked it away, causing the black haired boy to fall, not-so-gracefully, on his face. Remus laughed at his friend but held the parchment out of reach nevertheless.

Sirius stuck his tongue out at his friend but sat up straight anyway. "Oh, shut up." He wrinkled his nose at his barely written essay. "Guess I should do this though, huh?" He sighed. "Unless you wouldn't mind doing it for me…" Sirius turned to Remus hopefully.

"Tough luck with that." Remus smiled at Sirius dryly and patted him on the shoulder.

"Damn…" Sirius looked over his essay, disappointed.

"I do have something that may help you though…" Remus remarked.

"Really!" Sirius turned to Remus once more.

"Yeah… This." Remus dumped his Potions textbook into Sirius' lap, emitting a small "Oomph!" from the boy.

"Oh, gee…thanks." Sirius stared at the book.

"You're very welcome." Remus said generously, dipping his quill in the ink and writing "Good kisser" on his parchment scrap.

(page break)

The hallways of Hogwarts became quite dark and scary after midnight, Alice noticed as she tiptoed on the stone floors. In her hand, she held several flyers, announcing the single status of certain anonymous redhead. "Loves to read, not a one night stand, intelligent, good looking" the posters exclaimed.

Alice pushed thumbtacks into the corners of her ingenious flyer when her eye saw another flyer…one equally as brightly colored. She read through it quickly, before snatching it off the bulletin board and stuffing it into her pocket.

'Perfect,' She though. It was almost as if she had her work cut out for her.

(page break)

"I really doubt this, Alice." Lily said, looking through a shelf of books. The two girls were at the library, Lily studying for the upcoming History quiz and Alice trying to convince Lily of this other anonymous single student.

"I'm telling you, Lily. I bet it's Amos Diggory." Alice thrust out the flyer in her friend's face once more. "See? It says that he's a Quidditch player, is a good kisser… It can't _not_ be him!"

"I don't think I can trust you after you posted flyers that announce my desperation _all over the school._" Lily finished her sentence through gritted teeth. "And who just announces that he's a good kisser?"

"But Lily! It's obvious that he posted all his flyers to get your attention!" Alice pulled her friend's book away, making Lily look at her with a rather cross expression. "Look, it says to meet whoever this person is at The Three Broomsticks on the next Hogsmeade trip. The table in the corner, it says. You _must _go. I'm telling you…fate is drawing you to this guy!"

"I rather doubt it, Alice." Lily mumbled.

"Lily, look. You are looking for someone. He is looking for someone. You like him. He obviously likes you. What more do you want?" Lily sighed at Alice's statement. Truth be told, she was right. It was just that…Amos Diggory was very…intimidating.

"I just…don't know, Alice." Lily sighed. "But I guess you're right. I should…give this a try, I suppose."

"That's the spirit!" Alice encouraged. "Now…I need to teach you how to flirt, to seduce him with your womanly wiles!"

"…I really hope you're kidding." Lily gave her friend a long, long stare.

Alice ignored her. "When you kiss him you'll have to…

(page break)

Sirius was worried. He had woken up to some badly tuned howling and realized that, behold, James was still as high as a kite. He knew that it would be him that Remus would be mad at, and really did not want to face the wrath of his friend on such an early hour.

"SIRIUS!"

Too late.

"What were you _thinking_!" Remus rushed to the black haired teen to grab Sirius' shoulders and shake them. "James is still high…" The teen moaned and dropped to his knees, freaking out just a bit. "What do we do…?"

Sirius thought for a moment. "Don't worry…if any of the teachers notice-"

"Notice? Of _course_ they'll notice! They're not _stupid_!"

"-we'll just blame it on James'…mental condition." Sirius brightened with his idea.

"James doesn't have a mental condition!" Remus looked at his friend as though he though that _Sirius_ were the crazy one.

"Ah, but the teachers don't know." Sirius grinned at Remus.

"You're absolutely _insane._" Remus said after a pause. "The. Teachers. Are. Not. Stupid." The rather worried teen began hitting his head upon Sirius' bed.

"Oh, you're freaking out over nothing." Sirius said airily. We'll come up with _something. _We're the Marauders!" He announced proudly as Remus continued his head banging.

(half an hour later)

"We're doomed." Sirius said gloomily. The two friends had spent the last half hour chasing after James before finally getting him to settle down in the library. "It's a good thing that it's a weekend." He mumbled, resting his head on a table.

"James is dead when he gets off his high." Remus muttered, glaring at the said teen who was currently in the process of trying to eat a large blue book. "Don't eat that, James. If you're hungry, I'll send Sirius to get you some breakfast."

"Oh, no… I'm much too tired." Sirius mumbled. "I'm not going anywhere. Do you realize that the idiot woke me up at _five_ with his singing?" The black haired boy looked rather cross. Remus gave a smile.

"Sirius…I get up at five on a normal basis." He said.

Sirius stared.

(page break)

"OI! EVANS!" A voice called out from behind Lily. She grabbed the flyer from Alice's hand to hide in her pocket before turning.

"Oh shoot me." She muttered to Alice. "Potter is here to show off his immensely big ego again." Lily rolled her eyes and Alice giggled.

"Hey Evans!" James…_skipped_ over to where Lily was sitting. She blinked a couple of times, to make sure that her eyes were not deceiving her. "Watcha doin'?" He pushed his grinning face into her's.

"I was working until you came along." Lily muttered. "What's wrong with you?"

"Nothing's wrong!" James clapped his hands, giggling. He then proceeded to attempt to sit himself on Lily's lap, emitting a cry of shock from the girl.

"James Potter! What the bloody-!" Lily stood up abruptly, face flushed with anger. Alice stared at James a bit before bursting into laughter, something Lily glared at. James ran around in little circles, singing "Mary Had a Little Lamb."

"Sorry! Oh my God!" Remus' voice piped up from behind Lily and someone ran past her to James. Remus took hold of his friend's arm and muttered a flustered apology to Lily, forcing James to stop singing.

"Sorry 'bout this, Lily." Lily turned around to face an entertained looking Sirius Black. "He's really…not himself today." The black haired boy laughed.

"Shut it, Black." Lily muttered crossly before sitting back down in her chair. "The _nerve_ of Potter…" She mumbled.

'Idiot Potter…' She thought. She certainly hoped that Amos Diggory was a whole lot smarter.

(page break)

"Alright, man." Sirius clapped his no longer high friend on the shoulder. "In less than a week, we've found the perfect girl for you." He smiled cheerfully. His plan was working a lot better than he thought.

"Really? Who?" James looked up from his book, eagerly.

"Erm…we can't say but just take a look at this flyer over here." Sirius held up brightly colored poster.

"'Loves to read, not a one night stand, intelligent, good looking'" James took the poster and read it out loud. "Hey! That's actually not too bad." He remarked at Sirius. James looked back at the flyer and read a scrawled note that someone had written. "'Meet you there.'" He read.

"The table in the corner of The Three Broomsticks." Sirius informed him.

"Wow, how did you manage this?" James stared at his friend. "I never knew you had it in you."

"Well, on your poster, we said to send answer with the brown owl that always hovers above the rest." Sirius explained. "You, know…the one that hates people? That ripped your finger off in your first year?"

"Yeah…I know which one." James frowned, a little annoyed.

"Okay. So they sent an answer and now…you've got a date!" Sirius grinned. "Ingenious, huh?" James nodded.

"I guess, Sirius old pal…you're smarter than you look."

Sirius grinned.

"We've got six minutes before he's supposed to show up." Alice announced, looking at her watch. "Do you remember everything I've taught you?" She asked a nervous looking Lily.

"Yeah… but what if…he's expecting me to be someone different, Alice?" Lily and Alice were both standing outside The Three Broomsticks, waiting for the hour hand to reach ten. "Or if he's not Amos? And is some loser wanting to be snogged?"

"It's definitely Amos." Alice said airily. "Come one Lily. You've got to go...do you realize that I had to wrestle the stupidest owl in the Owlery for this? You can even cry for help if you need it." She reassured her.

"Alright. I'm going in." Lily gave her friend a tight lipped smile and a hug. 'Be brave, Lily, be brave…' She thought to herself.

(page break)

"Alright, buddy." Sirius grinned. "You're going in." James winked at his friends before sticking his tongue out, looking rather cheerful and relaxed. He wasn't worried. He would win over this girl with his charm, wit, and good looks. He knew it.

James looked into the window of the restaurant, just to make sure that his mystery date wasn't a troll. It took a moment for the gravity of this new information to sink in. James smiled.

"Remember not to leave her just because she won't go to bed with you!" Remus called out. Sirius rolled his eyes at his friend.

(page break)

Lily was a bit relieved that The Three Broomsticks was so crowded. She found the table in the corner empty, except for a small pink sign that said, "reserved" in big letters. 'Thoughtful of Amos,' she thought 'to reserve it.' She smiled and took a seat.

"Sorry…excuse me." Lily heard a rather unwelcome person say from behind her. She turned around to glare at James Potter.

"What are _you_ doing here?" She asked crossly. The last thing she needed was for this psycho to ruin her first date.

"Nice thing to say to your date." He grinned, taking a seat. Lily stared.

"You? Sense of humor? Good grades? Nice guy?" He grinned at her. "Oh…no! Nuh-uh." She made a move to leave.

"Hey!" James frowned and grabbed her arm, forcing her to stay. "What's wrong with me?"

"What's _wrong_ with you?" She was aghast at James. "Well, I can go on all day with _this._" She took a seat. "First off, you've an arrogant beast."

"Am not." James countered, frowning.

"Second," Lily talked over him, "you're childish. I can't believe this. What idiot wrote that flyer?" She took out a copy of the brightly colored poster from her pocket.

"'Hey… You can't deny what my flyer said." James frowned, deciding not to say "Sirius and Remus wrote it." "I'm play Quidditch. I'm nice." He frowned again. "What were the other ones?" James grabbed the orange piece of paper from Lily's hands.

"I'm funny." He continued. "I get good grades." He suddenly looked up from the flyer, a small smirk on his face. "And…I can be a surprisingly good kisser."

The next thing Lily knew, James Potter was pressing his lips on her own. Shock was the first thing that came to mind but she found that she didn't actually want him to stop. 'Snogging loser,' she thought but found no anger that accompanied the thought.

Lily smiled into the kiss and even found herself kissing back.

And after a surprisingly delightful lunch, Lily found herself sticking out her tongue at a confused and bewildered Amos Diggory.

o o

A James and Lily Story

by Alice Yang

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, ALEXANDRA!

o o

(Would anyone happen to know what page breaks work on ffnet now? READ AND REVIEW!)


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